A week ago, I ran my second half marathon- the Hollywood Half. I was able to rope in 7 of my friends, old and new, to run it with me. Friends from high school, friends from Victorville, and my neighbor. Before we new it, the 13.1 miles had come and gone. It was a fun race (minus the 7 minutes waiting in line for the facilities mid-race and a monstrous hill for the last 2 miles) and in the end I crossed the finish line - last of all my friends. My finish time was 2:15 (really 2:08 - minus those frustrating 7 minutes on the side of the road). I was ultimately happy with my time. Heck, I ran 13 + miles, something many will never get to accomplish, I should be very pleased. But somehow, I felt deflated from the experience.
I'm sure part of it was because my first half marathon was so dissapointing. It was a very small, disorganized race that began an hour late, had us mixed with the 10K runners, which led to the race workers sending myself, my friend (and other frustrated runners) in the wrong direction, bringing us to the finsish line at mile 8. That left an extra 5.1 miles for us to come up with on our own. Thankfully I had a GPS tracker on my phone and we eventually figured it out. The drama of the event made for a frustrating experience and I dearly hoped this second attempt would prove more successful.
Not that the Hollywood Half was a bad experience. On the contrary. The first 9 miles were fantastic! It was amazing to be surrounded by thousands of enthusiastic runners in the middle of Hollywood! It wasn't until I was waiting in line on the side of the road, watching the clock tick on, and runners pass by, that my head game began. I felt deflated by the wasted time. Running is such a mental sport and the only person I was competing against was myself. I felt I had somehow let myself down. I knew my official time was no longer going to be what I was hoping for (2:10)and that really bummed me out. When I got to the finsih line and saw how extrememly happy all my friends were with their race experinece and times, I was happy for them but I also felt like a failure. After all the time I trained and worked toward my goal, it was squashed because, of all things, as my kids would say, "I had to go potty". How lame is that? And what bothered me even more, was that I was dissapointed in myself. How can you be disappointed about something that isn't your fault?
As the week went by I tried to shake off the dissapointment. I was looking into any half marathon I could run in the near future. I was determined to have a great half marathon experience even if it meant running every half in the state of CA. I was obsessed. It wasn't until a 6 mile run on Saturday that I realized I was being idiotic. As I ran my favorite trail, listening to my favorite tunes, on a beautiful Southern California spring day, I remembered there is so much more to running than a race. Here are some of the reasons why I run:
* To get a break from my 4 beautiful (crazy) children.
* To clear my head and think through problems/concerns.
* To relieve stress and anxiety.
* To work towards a rockin' hot body.
* Because I love chocolate.
* To set goals and push myself.
* Because it's empowering!
And the final reason I run is because it's a great metaphor for life. Somedays running is great! Other days, it plain sucks. And when it comes to running the race of life, we have to tackle the tough hills. They're not fun, but they make us stronger. And when we finally get to run down the other side of that hill, it can be exhilarating! Sometimes, we just need to take a moment and slow down. What's the point of running, if we don't stop and take in the views now and then (or a little In-n-Out)? And when we get sent the wrong way or have to take a pit stop, it can be dissapointing and downright infuriating, but the important thing is we keep on running!
